At one time, this was a $100 card.

Fast forward ten years, and now it's just dollar-box fodder.

Formal Declaration of Bip War.

In accordance with The Third Hague Convention of 1907, and Article I, Section 8, of the U.S. Constitution; my formal rescinding of Declaration of Bip War against the Federal Republic of Cardboardjunkistan, has itself, been rescinded.

In addition, I am declaring Bip War against the "Axis Powers" of The Kingdom of Thorzullia, The Soozo-Marian Empire, The Peoples' Front of Judea, The Judean People's Front, The Judean Popular People's Front, The Campaign for a Free Galilee, The Popular Front of Judea, and all other affiliated allies.

This ain't over yet.

Oh, you may have thought it was all over.

And you would be wrong.



The latest salvos have already been fired. Damn the torpedoes! Hide the women & children! And full-steam ahead!

Tournament of Gimmicks: We Have A Winnah!

It a shocking upset, the 2007 Topps Derek Jeter base card (with photos of George W. Bush and Mickey Mantle airbrushed in, for no apparent reason) has been crowned the worst Hobby gimmick of all time following a 63-56 victory in the Championship Game over Upper Deck's Yankee Stadium Legacy.



Despite getting a #4 seed in the tough Olbermann region, Jeter was able to defeat the #13-seed 2008 Topps Red Sox Rudy Giuliani gimmick in the first round, then punched their ticket to the Sweet Sixteen over an upset-minded #12-seed: the 2000 Pacific Invincible ManRam corked bat card.

In the Olbermann Regional Semi-Final, Derek Jeter was up against a true dark horse, a card picked by some to make it to the Final Four: The 2008 Upper Deck Hillary Clinton/Morgana card. Both sides went back-and-forth in a gimmick match-up for the ages. But when the final buzzer sounded, it was Jeter moving on to meet 2008 UD Documentary in the Regional Final.

The Regional Final was no contest. Although Crockumentary had a strong profile, and was despised by all in The Hobby, it was no match for Jeter/Bush/Mantle.

In the Final Four, in what some called "The Real Title Game" the Derek Jeter with paired with the #1-seeded Kazuo Uzuki. The card of the fake player versus the card with the fake backgound! The roof of Lucas Oil Stadium wasn't able to contain all the bullshit. But after a close match, it would be the Jeter playing for the Championship, and Kazuo Uzuki going back to law school.

After that epic Semi-Final, The Championship itself was a bit anti-climatic. Yankee Tedium Lunacy was a deserving opponent, and had this been any other year, might have been the one to cut down the nets. But on this night, and in this year, the 2007 Derek Jeter/George W. Bush/Mickey Mantle card was too much bullshit for even YSL to handle.

THE 2007 TOPPS #40 OF DEREK JETER/GEORGE W. BUSH/MICKEY MANTLE HAS BEEN CROWNED THE DUMBEST GIMMICK IN THE HISTORY OF BASEBALL CARD COLLECTING!

Tournament of Gimmicks Championship Game

Who will get to cut down the nets and have "One Shining Moment" played in their honor? IT'S UP TO YOU!

Tournament of Gimmicks Final
2007 Topps #40 Jeter/Bush/Mantle
2008-09 Upper Deck Yankee Stadium Legacy
See Results

Tournament of Gimmicks: THE MATCH-UP OF THE CENTURY HAS BEEN SET!!!!

The results of the T.O.G. Semi-Finals are in!

Semi-Final #1

#1 2008 Topps #FS1 Kazuo Uzuki: 58
#4 2007 Topps #40 Jeter/Bush/Mantle 70

Semi-Final #2

#3 "Franken-Cuts" 43
#1 2008/09 Upper Deck Yankee Stadium Legacy 69

The Championship Match-Up to crown the worst gimmick of all time is now set. Will the upstart Jeter/Bush/Mantle card from 2007 Topps be crowned the dumbest gimmick in Hobby history? Or, will it be Yankee Tedium Lunacy? WHO WILL CUT DOWN THE NETS? Stay tuned to this, and many other fine cardblogs, TOMORROW!

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Tournament of Gimmicks: A Correction.

Please note that I made a minor mistake when setting up the Tournament of Gimmicks Semi-Final #1 poll. The winner of the Jefferson Burdick Regional was Kazuo Uzuki, but when I set up the poll, I accidentally entered the Billy Ripken Fuck Face card. I was able to change the HTML code for my blog (and the Cardboard Junkie's), but was unable to correct it with the poll host.

Therefore, if you voted for Kazuo Uzuki, it will be recorded as a vote for Billy Ripken. If Billy Ripken "wins," it means Kazuo Uzuki will advance to the Championship Game.

With that said, voting for the Semi-Final Round ends at Midnight tonight.

The Tickets to the Gimmick Final Four Are Being Punched

Result from the Burdick Regional Final

1) 2008 Topps #FS1 Kazuo Uzuki - 15
3) 1989 Fleer #616 Billy Ripken "Fuck Face" - 12

Result from the Olbermann Regional Final

2) 2008 Upper Deck Documentary - 24
4) 2007 Topps #40 Jeter/Bush/Mantle - 43

Result from the Beckett Regional Final

4) 2006 Topps #297 Alex Gordon - 5
3) "Franken-Cuts" - 7

Result from the Berger Regional Final

1) 2008/09 Upper Deck Yankee Stadium Legacy - 22
3) 2001 Donruss Elite Extra Edition $5.99 Redemption Cards - 9

Tournament of Gimmicks: Regional Finals

BURDICK REGIONAL FINAL



1) 2008 Topps #FS1 Kazuo Uzuki

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3) 1989 Fleer #616 Billy Ripken "Fuck Face"

Click here to vote in this regional final.

OLBERMANN REGIONAL FINAL



4) 2007 Topps #40 Jeter/Bush/Mantle

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2) 2008 Upper Deck Documentary

Click here to vote in this regional final.

BECKETT REGIONAL FINAL



4) 2006 Topps #297 Alex Gordon

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3) "Franken-Cuts"

Click here to vote in this regional final.

BERGER REGIONAL FINAL



1) 2008/09 Upper Deck Yankee Stadium Legacy

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3) 2001 Donruss Elite Extra Edition $5.99 Redemption Cards

Click here to vote in this regional final.

Tournament of Gimmicks: Regional Semi-Final Results

"Hi everyone, I'm Gus Johnson, and welcome to the Regional Semi-Finals of the Tournament of Gimmicks."



"In the Jefferson Burdick Region, Kazuo Uzuki easily defeated the 2008 upside down gimmicks 26-7. OOOOHHHHHHH MY!!!!!!! THIS IS AS GOOD AS IT GETS!!!!!

And in the other game OOHHHHH WHAT AN UPSET!!!! As the Billy Ripken Fuck Face card WITH ENGLISH!!!!! took down Manufactured Letter Patches 20 to 13."

"Now, let's go to the Olbermann region, where in an INSTANT CLASSIC!!!!!! the #4 seeded Derek Jeter/Mickey Mantle/George W. Bush card BURIED IT!!!! on the the #1 seeded Johan Santana fake no-no. And in the other half of the region, UD Documentary CLIMBED THE MOUNTAIN!!!! and eeked out the win on a last second three-pointer over the Hillary/Morgana gimmick. WHAT A GAME!!!!!"

"Moving on to the Jim Beckett Bracket, in an MAJOR UPSET!!!! Alex Gordon had GET AWAY FROM THE COPS SPEED!!!!! as the #4 seed took out the #1 seeded "Jon" Smoltz card from last year's Heritage. Meanwhile Franken-Cuts, the cut signatures that everyone loves to hate, went all RISE AND FIRE!!!!! (count it) on Poley Walnuts.

Finally, in the Sy Berger Regional, as expected Yankee Stadium Legacy is through to the Elite Eight with a 16-9 win over Topps Moments & Milestones. It was HEART!!!! BREAK!!!! CITY!!!! for TM&M, who put up a strong fight, but in the end it was YSL that was the stupider gimmick. Finally, for the last ticket into the Regional Final, we had what many would call a Final Four-type match-up as #2 seeded Scoreboard Abe went DOWN TO THE WIRE!!!! with the #3 seed DEEE $5.99 Redemptions. It was an INSTANT CLASSIC!!!! but the $5.99 redemptions BROUGHT THE PAIN!!! and beat Scoreboard Abe by a single point."